For I Have Sinned
By Tradgik


Authors Notes: 'For I Have Sinned' has been one of the fanfics I have most enjoyed writing. I hope you have as much fun reading it. It's based on the episode Doppelgangland, with very different events. That is, written as a W/X fic. Or should that be VW/X?





Part 1



Xander was glad he had come to the Bronze that night. They were having depressing music night.

It had been a few days since Oz had forgiven Willow and taken her back. Cordelia was back at school, as well as reverting back to her old antics of ridiculing the slayerettes, especially Xander. He in turn felt guilty every time he saw Cordy and Oz. And he felt his heart ache when he saw Willow.

Letting the music wash in waves through his mind, his depression set in. He told himself to stop feeling sorry for himself. To stop his heart from hurting after Willow rejected him. The band started a new song.

He pulled himself up from the green lounge, forcing his legs to walk into the crowd.

The beginning chords wrapped around his body, making it almost move on its own. Xander dance slow, rhythmic movements with closed eyes as he let his mind wander.

I�m sure you�re only dreaming
while you�re juggling with my mind
while I feel more and more like screaming
for the scars you left behind



Arms slid around him and he opened his eyes in surprise. Willow had her arms around his shoulders and she was wearing a tight fitting leather ensemble. The blackness contrasted against her unusually pale skin. Crimson silk lined her bodice and she smiled a crimson crescent. Xander felt his knees go weak at the sight of her as she danced with him. He didn�t protest.

I�m sure you�re only dreaming
I�m sure we�re just a part
of what a lucky man believes in
I�m sure you know this song by heart


You�re only dreaming, I think I can heart you talk
You�re only dreaming, I think I can hear you say �shut up�
You�re only dreaming, I hope your dream is in me
You�re only dreaming you�re free



She wrapped her arms around his body, pulling herself closer. Her leather clad body rubbed against him as she danced, writhing under his arms.

You will show up when I�m dreaming
out of nowhere cross my way
you will ask me not to scream and
you will smile and you will say, �dear friend,
you�re only dreaming. . .�



He dared to draw in a ragged breath, closing his eyes and tingling at her intimate body contact. The music was slow and melancholy.

�Should we be doing this?� His voice jumped an octave as her hands travelled downwards suddenly. �Hands in new places!� He tried to jump away, but she wriggled back close to him.

She looked up at him, her dark red lips curving. �Wanna be naughty?�

Xander almost jumped out of his skin. �Heh heh, you do remember some rule about not touching, don�t you Will?� he asked nervously. Mentally, he told himself to calm down and get away from Willow before Oz came along with a big plank. As a matter of fact, he was reluctantly planning a getaway when Willow leaned in towards him and licked his neck slowly. Trying to piece together the thoughts that suddenly shattered, he saw something that jolted him back to a twisted reality.

Oz.

In a horrible, frozen panic between the barely controlled desire for his best friend and the alarm of her boyfriend suddenly appearing, he almost overlooked the fact that the guitarist was clasping the hand of his red headed girlfriend.

�Willow!� he exclaimed in shock.

�Willow!� he yelped again, tearing away from the girl�s carnal kiss. She looked up and grinned at him, like a satisfied tigress.

�What�s happening?�

The leather clad Willow looked behind her with the corner of her eye. Then she raised a finger and put it to her lips.

�Don�t be naughty now. Shh.� And she gently tugged his hand before stepping away and slipping into the crowded club.

Xander stared in shock as he watched Willow and Oz approach him. His best friend looked a little suspicious of him, but the guitarist wore his regular blas� expression.

�If you�re not dancing, you might want to get off the floor.� The werewolf gently pushed Xander towards some tables off to one side of the Bronze. The three students took seats.

Willow looked anxiously at the still stunned boy.

�Who was that girl you were with? I mean, she looked kinda...leathery.�

�Uh, just an old friend. I mean, new friend. Stop the third degree already,� he replied vaguely, while scanning the crowds for any sign of the other Willow, or possibly his insanity. He spotted Buffy as she entered the Bronze, hand in hand with her vampiric half. She waved with her free hand, ushering her boyfriend to their table. Xander swore he saw Angel making eyes at his neck.

�Are all my buds of the good?�

�Have a seat, Buffster. And one for Mr Fangs too.� Xander kicked out two chairs for his standing friends. Buffy quirked her eyebrow in perfect synchronisation with Angel.

�No impending Armageddon�s. Life is good,� replied Willow. �And Xander was telling us about his new girlfriend.� She emphasised the last word, hoping for a quick denial.

The Slayer raised an eyebrow as she took a seat. �Wow, getting over Cordy much? You skipped the Patsy Cline music rebound period!�

�Well, uh, I�m one of those irrepressible Casanova�s of the rejected kind,� quipped Xander nervously.

Willow sat there with a disappointed expression at his acceptance. Oz leaned closer to her.

�You want a drink, baby?�

She nodded. The werewolf pushed himself out of his chair, heading for the bar. Angel glanced from Buffy to Xander, finally deciding to stand up also. He gently kissed the slayer on the top of her head, whispering something about getting her a drink.

�Thanks,� she said perkily, turning her attention towards her two friends.

�Uh, I need to go to the bathroom.� Willow pushed back her chair and excused herself quickly.

Buffy leaned forward, looking at Xander with an analytical gaze, reminding him of the time she grilled him during the Chemistry test.

�What�s the deal with the new honey?� Her eyes darted to Willow�s retreating form, and then back to Xander.

He shrugged. �No deal. What�s the deal? Why would there be a deal about me having a girlfriend?�

�You got over Cordelia pretty quickly. Is this rebound?�

�Willow got over me quickly. Remember: one day we were so madly in- *like*, then she goes running back to wolfboy.�

�I think you made Willow jealous.�

�Willow jealous of-� he laughed at the irony of Willow being jealous of a girl he thought had been her. But when he thought about it, he felt a little more peeved.

�What, she goes back to her boyfriend without even telling me why she changed her mind, and now *I* don�t have the right to get a little happy?� he babbled, making sharp gestures with his hands.

�I didn�t mean it like that, Xander. It�s just that Willow is so much more-�

�Of a better friend?! Important?! *What*?� He held up his hands at the stunned Buffy. �No. Forget it. I don�t wanna hear.�

He pushed his chair backwards as Angel came back holding two drinks. Willow and Oz followed, each with a cup. They wore worried expressions on their faces.

�Something wrong?� Angel inquired, taking in the hurt look on Buffy�s face and the indignant one on Xander�s. The other two came around the table, waiting.

�Everything�s peaches and cream,� Xander exclaimed angrily, storming off.

* * *



Part Two Coming Soon
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